A List of 37 Things for My Birthday

Last year I wanted to write a blog of 36 things to celebrate my birthday. Unfortunately, it was never finished and never published. The big problem was being specific to that list.

This year, rather than try to drive myself crazy with another attempt at that list, I decided to make a bunch of smaller lists and combine them to make a super-list of 37 things for today.

  • Goals

    • Get to my high school weight

      I’ve not weighed 300 lbs since High School – before I lose all of my weight, let’s try to hit this number first!

    • Graduate from Rock Valley College

      Should have done it so long ago, and now that I’m so close, I might as well finish it!

    • Move!!!

      Apartment problems, bad neighborhood, rarity of being at home – these need to change!

    • Find a Full-Time Job

      I’m 37, and I’m still a seasonal/part-time worker? That needs to go – fast!

    • Go on a trip

      My last trip was with my ex – the trip was fun, but I’m overdue for another adventure!

    • A Karaoke Night/Singing again

      My vocals aren’t what they used to be (should practice more!), but doing this would be damn good fun!

    • Financial Stability

      Maybe not in one year, and I am making improvements, but it would be nice to not have to turn to loans to get by!

    • Do something that makes a major impact in life

      I’m going to be a junior once I get to Northern Illinois University – most college kids would have started something by this point. The fact that I’m older than most college kids means I have a lot of catching up to do!

  • People I miss

    • Grandparents

      The older I get and the further in classes I advance, the more I wish I could talk to them about these things I am learning.

    • The family and friends I’ve not seen in a long time

      School has disconnected me from some goals I had, as well as people I’ve not had as much opportunity to connect with.

  • Things I would do if I won a major lottery jackpot

    • Pay off debt.

      Obvious.

    • Set family up so I can worry about myself.

      Apart from paying them back, I need to do a lot of things to make myself better – things that will keep me away from people even longer. That may mean being away from something severe, such as car accidents, heart attacks, injuries, etc. This college thing is a big part of that, but there are things beyond school that I need the time and focus to address on my own – and having something to help tide things over until I can physically return would help them. Cover the house, some educational expenses, set aside some emergency funds – might not be as good as having me around, but I can hopefully make that up when I finish.

    • Go on a “Weight loss/personal” journey

      One of the things I like about Batman, especially as portrayed in “Batman Begins,” is the personal journey he takes to make himself the Dark Knight. He doesn’t just sit idle, he travels the world, learning the skills he feels he needs to learn to carry out his goals. There isn’t a set path to self-improvement, and sometimes that improvement doesn’t come from home – it comes from meeting others, learning about the world around you, and putting yourself into a situation. College is only a small part of that journey for me; if I had the money, I could explore other cultures I hear about, learn about how to take better care of myself by living in those cultures for a while, etc.

    • Buy some homes and property

      Homes are obvious, but by property, I mean for the next item.

    • Start the pieces of some businesses

      The biggest and best way to help someone improve is to give them something to do. I don’t have to be the biggest or the best at any industry – I just have to keep the companies afloat or continuously improving. In this way, I can help friends with jobs, and help other people move up in the world.

  • Things I wish people knew about me

    • Telling me you’re afraid that I’m going to kill you hurts me – a lot.

      I’ve heard this several times, often from women, and every time I hear it I can’t help but wonder what scares them about me. It doesn’t help that I don’t socialize that much with others, or that getting people to hang out with me is almost like pulling teeth – that only makes things extremely lonely and depressing.

    • Out-arguing me does not mean you’ve won the argument

      I hate, hate, HATE how many of you will either interrupt me to tell me I’m wrong, or let me finish then focus on that one part taking away from the whole of my comments in out-arguing me. More often than not, I nod my head and agree or get silent because when I see this in others, as I recognized myself doing it, I know the argument will only get worse and pointless. Sometimes the argument is important – but if it’s not, why bother making it a wedge-point in an otherwise good friendship?

    • Overkill of a song and lack of control is why I hate radio

      When I first heard “One,” the Metallica song I often list as my favorite, one of the things I realized was the emotional connection a song can have with someone. This would extend beyond the song itself, however: in songs with less of a connection, the people’s commentary would have a major impact on my view of the song as well, just as the constant playing of a song will destroy my enjoyment of it. Emotion carries over into whatever you’re doing, either consciously through singing and dancing, or subconsciously in your actions and reactions in what you are doing. It’s why I have the radio off in the car when I am alone: listening to Metallica, Dr. Dre or some other violent music tends to push me towards road rage as fast as music I dislike. (For working, studying and driving, if I have anything on and it’s not an extra day, I’ve learned that classical keeps me mellow and focused.)

    • I wish I was more socially comfortable and accepted

      This goes with the first item on this list – it’d be nice to have friends that called and invited me to things, or just came and hung out with me. Right now, it’s not a big deal – after all, school has enough of my attention – but what about when I’m done with that?

    • The hardest thing about college so far is cutting myself off from others

       

    • See my last few comments – I have to be cut off from others at this moment because people are a distraction. I need enough company to need to be in public, but hanging around friends keeps me away from what I need to focus on.
  • Points in time I’d travel to if time travel was possible.

    • Creation

      What if you knew how everyone was created? What if you could bring back the critical proof of how thing were made so that people could focus on other aspects of the world?

    • The 60’s/70’s

      There are so many reasons, but musically, it’d be awesome to meet some of the best musicians of their day back when they made what made them famous.

    • My childhood

      Specifically that point from 2nd grade on until I knew the path I set myself on I would stick to, I’d become my own best friend, an alternative to the father I lacked.

    • The night of my conception

      I’ve often debated about what I would do, if I’d stop my mom and dad from creating me, but the reality is, unless something major happened, I’d be created anyway. However, to be able to try to influence my dad into being the man he never was for me – or just kicking his ass for his failure – would be nice. (I forgave him a long time ago, but if I felt that was the way to change him for the better, why not?)

    • Various points in history that would benefit my family, friends and I

      What if you could go back, taking with you the currency of the time, and buy shares of companies that would rise, selling them just before they sink, and making investments that would pay off well into the future? What if you could alter a few friend’s bad points in their lives, make their lives better?

  • Things I would do if I was skinny

    Most of the rest of these are self-explanatory.

    • Sky diving

      This one’s more to conquer multiple fears than any other reason.

    • Mountain climbing/camping

    • Triathlon (specifically the Iron Man)

      Ever since I had heard of this event I’ve wanted to do it – mainly because how I heard of it was from a special on some of the athletes overcoming obstacles to participate. My ability to do it, as well as the things I have to overcome,

    • Form a band/music group

      Three factors have always held me back from doing this: Time to practice and play; Money for strings, instruments; and my self-image, particularly my weight. Confidence is only part of it: If I just sing, I know just standing there won’t entertain anyone or get them interested in the band, and if I’m doing more I need both the wind to continue singing and the stamina to sing and play an instrument for more than a few songs. Being able to run songs from one to another (a Metallica and Queen concert staple) as well as get the audience involved in the performance requires more, and if you don’t have it to give, no one’s going to care or want to care. (By “no one,” I mean more than the bar drunk – those there for the music alone.)

    • Take up a martial art

      This one’s not to learn fighting, as I once wanted to learn, but to learn body discipline. This doesn’t have to wait until I’ve lost all of my wait, but I need to lose enough to be confident in my ability to do what is asked of me.

  • Words of Wisdom I’d like to pass on to others

    – nothing original, just stuff I’d pass on…

    • “The biggest problem we face is the ability to communicate. Listen, think, then speak.”

    • “There is only one person holding you back – and you see that person in the mirror everyday.”

    • “If something has definition, it exists.”

    • “The strength of character in a person is their ability to stand by you at your worst, at your lowest points, as well as at your highest and best.”

    • “Find Happiness.”

      (Given by my ex’s father.)

  • Thank you

    – you guys are awesome, and make my life worth living!

    • My Family.

    • My Friends.

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